.My Inner Writer.
. Arietis .
Chii.Sepyhn @ FictionPress.com
Chii.Sephyn @ FanFiction.Net


.Blogskin Credits.
orangebananas @ deviantART
And my narcissistic self.

lalala *sings*

ky: ok, i'll be called jade, you crystal, XXX (some friend of hers, forgot her name :P), and fx bronze (or something along that line).
me: =.=

next, i told her about some name that i came up with, being that i couldn't run a search on it on any naming websites.
i mused to her that if i ever have a daughter in the years to come, i would name her "sephyn" (pronounced "seh-fin"). and if i got so lucky to have twins, a boy and a girl, maybe i'll name the boy "seraph" and the girl "sephyn".
cool, no?

or maybe i could name my son (if there is going to be one) "lucifer".
haha.. then i will have a boy with the fallen angel's name for a son.

"lucifer! come and have your dinner! stop playing /insert computer or online game name/!"

ky: then he would come and chop your head off. hahaha!! since he has the name of the fallen angel.
me: =.=

what if i would name one of the twins "lucifer" and the girl..

me: hi! these are my twins! this is lucifer and..
stranger/friend: angela?
me: no! LUCY!!
*i would rather name them "lucifer" and "angela" but ky just had to spoil the mood and suggest "lucy"*

all of a sudden, i had the worse vision ever.

me: the worst senario that could ever happen is naming your son "lucifer" and he grows up to be an extreme nerd, reading thick physics books everyday.
ky: hahahaha.
me: i will cry.
ky: i will laugh at you.
me: =.=

we read through the naming website and found some weird, funny, and ridiculous names.
there was a "ceres", whose meaning is "princess of the corns", or something like that.
what, like her family owns a corn plantation?
lol.

amuse yourselves.

Labels: Creations, Scribbles

anyways, i went to the outdoor stadium with sl today to watch the syf central judging of outdoor bands.

it was hot, stuffy, and leaves kept falling from the top where there shouldn't be any trees at all.
i felt kinda "out", being one of the few people in home clothes, and being a little too old to be surrounded by secondary school kids.
still, it's a nice feeling to be among all the white and green that is signature colour of tk.
really missing my old uniform T-T

it's a nice feeling, to be around people that make you feel comfortable as if it's where you belong. i mean, 4 years isn't a very long time but i guess i got very much attached to tk.
the juniors reminded me of how we used to behave at band competitions; throwing things here and there, the part of the cheers that we're best at is the screaming, and our sarcasm towards the poor student councillors at the front.

i think i will come back every two years to scream along with my "4-year family" and cheer for tk band.
for some unknown reason, when it came to tk-related stuff like these, i'll get these immense sense of pride (even though i'm not from band but hey, we're from the same school =.=) when i remember that i used to be a tk student before. i guess i really am too attached to tk.
tk's a damn good school, alright?

and i'll never understand why other schools like to imitate our old gimicks like, coloured fans and all the bowing and stuff.
you don't see our band re-using these stuff. come up with your own tricks will you?
besides, these extra things are just what they are: extras.
what really matters is the flawless synchronised choreography and the music.
who cares if your uniform looks like a cowboy suit? who cares if you've got people dancing around waving flags (i insist that this was a trick to prevent the judges from realising that someone in the main formation made a mistake)? who cares if your band major shakes her butt in that skirt of hers?
they still can't compare to the standard that tk has with only their plain black uniform with the exception of the instruments glistening in the sunlight.

simple and to the point.
well, only tk has the substance to do it anyways.

oh, and lot's of people fainted while waiting for the results to come out *laughs evilly*
sl said that the long wait for the results was because all the judges come from different countries (thailand, japan, canadian, what-have-you) they have difficulty understanding wth the others are trying to say and so ended up fighting.
so lame =.=
then again, all tk people are lame.

gold with honours.
i shall return in july for the final competition.
TK ROX!!~

Labels: TK

so finally the sky decided to be kind and stop pouring like it did for 3 plus hours.
met up at sl's block at around 4 and went to parkway with my mother and sister tagging along.

how pathetic can it get, none of the shoes i saw gave me a "spark" or the urge to buy it that instant (but i'm not much of a buy-on-impulse person anyways) or that inner voice shouting "THAT'S MINE!!".

finally found a pair that had me looking at it over and over again, so i thought "oh well, this will be it."

*drumroll!* they don't have it in my size.

*faints*

so the four of us ending up spending money on scoopz ice-cream, breadtalk, and dinner which my mother ta bao home because she was too lazy to cook (my guess).
walked sl home after that and we all realised that we didn't get to buy what we wanted while all the stuff that we bought were FOOD.
lol..

anyways, i found out that i could watch japanese movies on youtube!
yeah, that's kinda slow of me to know that now but hey, better early than late.
was watching NANA just before i started blogging this entry. it's from a manga series of the same name.
not a very "wow!" movie because the manga-ka really put in a lot of effort into her books and it's difficult to duplicate that extra something into her manga in the movie.
but the two main actresses' acting was good. i give them credit for that.

nakashima mika rocks!!
^_^

what happens when what you need and what you want run on parallel lines that will never coincide?

and no, i won't put that link up here.
sheesh! my face..

this time around, i wasn't worrying as much as i did the past few times when we had to change classes and almost everyone else in my class are complete strangers.
maybe it's because i've finally got used to changing classes all the time? ok so it's not all the time but, yeah..
from first impression, the people in my new class seem pretty ok to me (and julia's in my class so there's at least 1 person that i know). 14 (or was it 18?) people in my class. kinda small-scaled, don't you think so?
there're like only around 90 people in the whole of LOM for my year.
oh well, i think this class will be much easier to get along with compared to last year, considering the absence of a certain person by the name of "janice".

only a few minutes ago, i've been thinking, maybe i thought too little of my BSG class. the people aren't that bad after, if i really think about it.
it's just that, as a class, we weren't very united. but in separate groups, although it may feel a little loose at times but there is still a connection significant enough to notice.

maybe it's just my problem of not knowing how to open up to lots of people at once, and being too used to just sticking to 1 or 2 to build a strong friendship.
but with my old way, real friends can be gained with a stronger bond. plus i'm not a people's-person anyway.

i'm trying.
comparing now and years back when i was still so self-conscious and so lacking in self-confidence, it's good progress.
this sort of thing can't be overcome just at a snap of the fingers.
i'll just keep trying and one day, i'll over come my self.

and to celebrate this special post, i shall share with you something stupid that happened to me today!!

well actually today was sort of for me to get some new stuff to wear since school is starting again real soon.
my mother paid for a grey tee-shirt that i saw at bum (omg my first dark-coloured tee!! lol.. it's not that dark after all =.=) and did some window shopping (i'm building up my christmas wishlist as we went along hoho.. anyone buying presents for me this year?) at converse, where i saw a pair of shoes and a bag that i would have bought to take over my old ones if it weren't for the price T-T

anyways, after that i met up with ky to hunt far east for jeans because i only have 3 pairs and i don't really like one of it thus the need for a new pair.
found 1 that's faded (because i don't have a pair that's faded), at half price too, which reduced it to $19.50.

the only 2 problems are that it's so long and flared that i couldn't see either of my feet.
"my feet!! where are my feet?!"
haha.. ky n i were kinda entertained by it.

so we went upstairs to get it altered (when i could have it at a cheaper price altered near my house but i didn't know of any shops that does alterations here then).

total cost of the jeans?
$34.50 (inclusive of $15 alteration fees)
=.=

crappiness.

enough about that jeans.
next we went to heeren to meet up with my bf (who kept rushing me AGAIN today. in case no one noticed, people, especially girls, would rather have one whole day to find what they want to buy plus it's easy to get pissed when rushed while shopping).

let's put this down first: this only pair of converse shoe that i wear is quite worn out at the bottom with a hole at the sole of each shoe.
conclusion? it's slippery on wet surface. and it was raining very heavily. seriously, this was the first time i felt such large droplets of rain.

so ky n i were walking-half-running all the way to heeren (kinda fun, haven't walked in the rain for a while) and she slipped.
i was sort of walking behind her and i couldn't stop in time plus my slippery shoes thus i ended up slipping too.
i guess that's what happened then. felt kinda stupid haha.. you don't see 18 year olds (technically ky isn't 18 yet but, oh well, it's the same year) falling down in the rain everyday outside paragon, orchard road, near the crossroad between paragon and takashimaya, everyday.

tag my board if you saw 2 crazy looking girls on the wet ground outside paragon.
very high possibility that it's ky n me. haha..

drenched wet (well, almost) and having fell down at orchard road, other than feeling stupid (had a good laugh when i repeated the incident to my mother when i got home), it's kinda ok.
i mean, it isn't everyday while you're a teenager that these things happen to you. so i guess it's fine to enjoy all these stupid, embarassing, crazy moments when your right as a teen entitles you to do so.

woohoo the joys of being 18!!!
i fell down at orchard T-T

slight rain, cold-but-not-too-cold wind blowing from the sea, the smell of rain (although i can't quite smell it due to the fact that i had been sneezing the moment i entered the bathroom) and the huge pale bluish-grey cloud hovering over yet not blocking out the sun.

nice huh^_^
only if you like rainy days as much as i do.

anyways, how about a random bit of something?
this is what happens when you stop at the height of your spin.

i just saw an eagle right outside my window!!!
not really sure what species it is but who cares!!
an eagle was flying around outside my window!!!

it looked so huge!!

the earthy brown of its feathers are like, just so beautiful!!

this just can't be compared to some caged up bird in jurong bird park.
i'm talking about a free bird, stretching it's wings flying outside my window!!!

and i have no idea why i got so excited but to heck with it!!

it disappeared somewhere among the trees along east coast park.

AN EAGLE WAS FLYING OUTSIDE MY WINDOW!!~

seriously, playing pool does not make one a gangster or some horrible person who goes burning off national flags and living in a pigsty of a room while making his/her parents' life like living hell.

oh please, i play pool. my other friends play pool. and they are not this kind of lowlife that you keep associating pool with.
hello? i practically have this "nerd-aura". seen a nerd play pool and then being transformed by it into a gangster (or gangstress, for that matter) that doesn't return home until the sun comes up the next day and pesters their parents for money?

not everyone who plays pool is a horrible scum who shouldn't even be born.
it's like, most gangsters (or pai kia, as we would call them. or maybe ah bengs and ah lians) play pool but not everyone who plays pool is one.
get it?
like, an isoceles triangle is a triangle but not all triangles are isoceles triangles.

for goodness' sake, it's a hobby! an interest! so maybe there are people who like to, say, collect stamps. and there are others who like pool.
it differs for each and it's not like, the useful people on earth spend 23 hours each day in the library (which is impossible, considering the opening hours) while useless beings waste their lives in pool centres.
there are good things about pool like you learning to strategise your game, you know the angles and stuff.

it's like technology. it depends on how each person uses it.
some use it in a way to aid their work while others with nothing better to do use it to hack into others' systems.

i seriously don't want to hear about "singaporean kids have such tasteless lives. it's always either pool or gaming."
so what?
we like what we're doing and we're certainly not causing any harm (unless if you're talking about that ass that i defamed into negative points but that's another story).

i can say the same for others like "gosh how disgustingly plain your life is, working your butts off only to die after retiring for 20 years. oh you as well, sticking your ass next to your kid's everyday to make sure he/she finishes all the assessment books and homework and tuition work blah blah."

and to that mother of mine who hates singaporeans, neither do we like you. you hate us, jolly well don't marry one of our kind and lay your feet on the ground that you despise.

well, to put it simply, my mother found out about me having a bf and went on to create a huge HOOHA about it.
why?
because i had 7 points for my o'level while he flunked his the first time?
and why does everything else illogical but weirdly reasonable enough for them to reject him revolve around that single fact that i'm much smarter (i had already stopped trying to respond to people who are crazed about my 7 points)?

for goodness' sake, you don't look at people's IQ to determine who you want to give your heart to.
and just out of nowhere those two stupid adults who call themselves my parents starting badmouthing my bf and his parents.
wth?
fine. scold me, confiscate my handphone, take away the wireless connection to my laptop, anything. don't go insulting the people that are important to me and certainly not others' parents when you know next to nothing about them and what they do.

so what if there are other guys who are good people with better qualifications?
i don't want to live the rest of my life with a guy who is only capable of bringing home money and not being able to communicate with me.
like the lyrics from one of mayday's songs (yi ke ping guo): "one day in heaven can't be compared to one life of hardship with you" (tell me if i translated that wrongly), it's the person that you're with, not the physical possessions and qualifications that one has that make you feel that life is more complete.
yeah i know i sound a little farfetched, with it being the 21st century but i don't care. relationships are as old as time so why can't some of my views on it be like that?

and just when i thought that they (my parents) had given up and were letting me deal with this myself, that shrew had to force me into breaking up with my bf.
not a pretty picture.

was crying left right centre up down diagonal the past 2 days whenever i thought about us.
and still doing that when i dug out all the movie tickets, cards and stuff.
behaving kinda lunatic, come to think of it; staring at my couple ring in the middle of the night and tearing all over again.
i mean, it's just a lousy piece of cheap metal- that i don't even know if it's real silver- with his name engraved on the inside of the band.
yet it can mean so much, things that had come between and everything that we shared and some unexplainable thing that kept us together since more than a year ago.

no, the past 2 days were horrible. i had to live with the knowledge that i was going to have to tell him that because of my childish parents, we can't continue.
it had practically ate away whatever that was left of my conscience (which isn't much, actually. or was it my integrity? BAH).

in the beginning i had thought that if due to any reason we had to end, i will just take it, get over it and i won't get myself too deep into this person.
but what's the point of being with a person when you're not giving your all while the other is? it just isn't fair for him.
and i can't just do as i thought last time about getting over it quick because well, turns out i had put in parts of me and it isn't easy taking it back.
didn't fully understand how the lyrics to koda kumi's "butterfly" felt last time but now i really understood.

"you are not my 'everything', but without you, my 'everything' will collapse."

strangely cliche as it is, you only realise the true meaning of what you already have when you had to let it go.
yes it's dumb like, duh, he's the only one you can see since that's the only person you were with. but thinking long and hard, i really don't see anyone else in my future.

i was thinking like, breaking this off would be easier if it had been because of some stupid quarrel or stuff but then again, if it were some quarrel, we'd end up solving it and moving on so i guess there isn't much that could make us (at least me) ever think of breaking up (other than this time. no thanks to that shrew).

all sorts of weird thoughts were hurling through my mind, like i won't ever get over this, or maybe i'll just end up like some old 68-year-old virgin and worse thoughts than that.
no wait, there couldn't be any other worse thoughts than that, but believe me, my imagination was running away then.

well, all these self-torturing didn't get me anywhere because that damned bf of mine won't give in to my parents so i couldn't actually get to do what i had planned to do.
totally ruining other things that i had planned too. bleah.

oh well^_^

PHOTO ALBUMS
Tanjong Katong Sec. Class 4D
Temasek Polytechnic Campus Care Network (CCN) Day 2006
Upper Pierce Reservoir
Zoo outing with Janice, Jill, Phoenix and YM
Others

RANDOMNESS
Trip to Ossyria
KOIKE TEPPEI Madness

PEOPLE
Evan
Fabian
GuardiAngel
Janice
Jill
Jing Teng
Joannah
Julia
Ka Cheong
Ka Ying
Marianne
Mun Bbun
Pauline
Phoenix
Pin Hua
Rachel
Sui Lan
Wai Yin
Wan Ting
Yan Shan
Yee Long
Yip Teng